Writing Through Writer’s Block . . . and Finding Him

I have opened a new post entry almost daily for two weeks, and each time, the blank screen inside terrifies me.  I approach it with dread, knowing that the words won’t come- again.  No new thoughts, experiences, insights, observations spur my fingers to action.  I wonder if I will ever write another blog post.

To avoid this belief, I search through the thousands of themes available, in hopes of updating my site and giving it new life and purpose.  I scratch out countless new taglines in search of direction and inspiration.  Still, nothing.

I turned back to my fiction writing this week, perhaps to escape my reality of stomach bugs and writer’s block, or simply to satiate my hormones.  I looked upon a story I began earlier in the year and shuddered, wondering if I could or cared to reconnect with those characters again, to give them direction and resolution.  Then, I set them aside.  Not today.

Am I a writer?  Real writers write everyday.  Real writers have a message to share.  Real writers can’t help but write.  I can’t help but run away from the page and the screen, in fear of never writing again.

I want to be a writer.  I’ve wanted to be a writer since I was ten years old.  I have written on and off over the years: journal entries, newspaper articles, church publication pieces, snippets of stories.  But, I haven’t been serious about it.  I haven’t really believed or pursued my writing with passion and purpose.  Even with this blog, I have written as I’ve been inspired, but not with focused intensity and determination, not with excellence.

I write like I live.  Halfheartedly.

I don’t want to write- or live- halfheartedly anymore.  I want to write- and live- with intention, focus, purpose, excellence.  It’s not in my nature to do so, but I can rise above my nature with the Lord’s help.  And that is where my first focus must be in order for everything else to line up.  I simply must focus first upon Jesus- each day, each hour, each moment- seeking the excellent life of knowing Him.  Only then, can I serve both Him and others with my writing and my life.  Only then, do I have purpose and direction.  Only then, will I have a message to share.

And so, I write to discover where I have gone wrong, and I find it.  I find Him, waiting at the end of it, for me.  Here I am, Lord.  Use me.

Do you struggle with writer’s block (or “life block”)?  How have you overcome it?


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